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28-06-2019 10:59 PM
28-06-2019 10:59 PM
Re: Bipolar II partner - feeling overwhelmed
Hi @Rainy_nights ,
I have lived through a similar experience and I can say there is light at the end of the tunnel, however for me separating wasnt easy. It was like my skin was embedded in the cage that trapped me, and it was painful getting free. The peace in my house without him in it was beautiful. I had to deal with financial stress and hostility from him when I told him it was over, and later when handing over my daughter to him every second weekend. It got better when he got a new girlfriend six months later as she made him happy for a while. The initial fear and anxiety were horrible but it was worth it to have the peace in my house - and not having to put up with increasing disrespect from his end. The threats your partner have made are worrying and its better to be safe than sorry so if i were you I'd leave when he's out and go to a safe house with your child/children and warn your sister.. That could be your starting point. Good luck, my thoughts and well wishes are with you.
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28-06-2019 11:51 PM
28-06-2019 11:51 PM
Re: Bipolar II partner - feeling overwhelmed
Thank you @Shaz51
@Ali11 they certainly do! But I wouldn't have it any other way - he is the most incredible little human 😊
I am loving my study, so glad I took the plunge and did it - its something I've always wanted to do but thought I never could.
@SuzieQ I'm sure it gets worse (in a sense) before it gets better when choosing to walk away but I could only imagine the weight that would be lifted by doing so.
I find it difficult with the thought of leaving our son with him if we were to split. He rarely looks after him alone or has any responsibility with looking after our son on the daily, but I know when we argue about if I was to leave, he always says that he would want shared custody (1 week him, 1 week me). And once he has an idea in his head, he won't stop until he gets his way and I guess that is one thing that is deterring me from leaving too... at least this way our son is 100% in my care until I figure out the legalities of it all.
Dont get me wrong, he is a great dad when he wants to interact with him but he is yet to prove that he can be a full-time parent.
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29-06-2019 12:00 AM
29-06-2019 12:00 AM
Re: Bipolar II partner - feeling overwhelmed
I understand your doubts about having your partner look after your son alone - that is a serious consideration. That's difficult. Maybe if you went to family court he wouldnt get shared custody or any custody rights except supervised visits if you told the courts about his threats and abuse.
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29-06-2019 12:11 AM
29-06-2019 12:11 AM
Re: Bipolar II partner - feeling overwhelmed
It's something I'd certainly be looking in to.
I just know he depends on our son for his happiness though, I don't want to take that from him either.
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30-06-2019 09:30 AM - edited 30-06-2019 09:30 AM
30-06-2019 09:30 AM - edited 30-06-2019 09:30 AM
Re: Bipolar II partner - feeling overwhelmed
It's a really challenging position to be in @Rainy_nights, weighing up the safety of your son and yourself against the happiness of your partner. It sounds like you're being thoughtful about this situation and that's good. Happy to hear that the study is something you never thought you could do, it must feel great to be learning and following your passion
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17-07-2019 10:43 AM
17-07-2019 10:43 AM
Re: Bipolar II partner - feeling overwhelmed
Hi!
I can see lots of similarities with your difficulties dealing with your partner as I am having with my son. (who has had diagnosis of Bipolar 11 in the past)
Im glad you are getting help and support.
Its good to reach out
Take care
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